Sasquatches on the Dinner Table?

The Issue
In a bid to provide a new revenue stream for Scottovia’s Agriculture industry, it has been suggested that sasquatches could be added to the menu.

1. The fact is, the sasquatch population is out of control,” says Beef-Based Agriculture spokesperson Jazz Spirit. “We have to do something about them anyway, so why not market them as tasty snacks? We could have sasquatch kebabs, sasquatch pies, sasquatch-on-a-sticks–the possibilities are endless! Let’s not pass up this golden opportunity to provide a feast, if you will, for our economy.
2. “I agree that something needs to be done about sasquatch over-population,” says random passer-by Miranda Jefferson, “but eating them? That’s kind of gross. Let’s just shoot the ones we have to and shovel their bodies into ditches like normal.”
3. “I am shocked and appalled!” declared SPCA President Al du Pont. “If anyone needs to be culled, it’s us humans. The sasquatches were here first, remember? We need to take this as a sign to get our industry–agriculture in particular–to back off. The sasquatch is part of what makes Scottovia a great nation!”

#3 Accepted, of course.