The Scotto Grotto (org)

They Wait below….

Hmmmm. So *normally* they are so shy/elusive that of the 250 or so sightings almost all have been of corpses… but now they are at the surface and latching on to boats.

The big question is: what’s down in the deep cold dark that has scared them to the surface?

Big honkin’ Alpha-class sharks that’s what! As the sperm whale population was trimmed back by over-enthusiastic whalers, the squid population exploded without its natural predator to keep them trimmed back.

Then sharks followed the food down in the deep, and being an almost perfect primitive life form adapted to it’s environment, they thrived in the dark under pressure and just kept growing — as long as they kept swimming.

Nuclear waste dumped from US subs into the Marianas Trench probably also factored in there somewhere. Anyhow, the end result was BIG HONKIN’ SHARKS!! You know a whole Sweeps Week worth of them on Discovery Channel? Well, all that at once in one body. I’m talkin’ a hunka hunka heapin’ helpin’ of BIG HONKIN’ SHARK!!

Anyway, that’s my theory. I could be wrong.

Oh yeah, and all the pressure and the extreme cold radically effected their metabolisms, giving them the reflexes of Chow Yun Fat on Dexedrine. BIG *FAST* HONKIN’ SHARKS THE SIZE OF A SPRUANCE CLASS DESTROYER!!! With paranoid delusions and poor impulse control.

And, like, spikes and junk.