See you folks later… off to dinner…
I forgot to eat anything for lunch!
Looks like a tacobell gorgefest. yum!
See y’all on the flip side!
*be excellent to each other*
Daily Archives: August 24, 2000
Hardened Pasta… great, as long as you don’t eat it.
Hardened Cheddar Lasagna
Ingredients:
4 tubes epoxy resin
4 12 Oz. blocks Cheddar Cheese
4 12 Oz. blocks Mozzarella
2 Tsp. fresh chives
1 lb. meat of your choice (I use soy)
2 boxes dried lasagna noodles
1 box Prego powdered Pasta Sauce
This is another one that takes a little time, so plan ahead!
First, set aside about six hours to grate your 8 blocks of cheese. DO NOT buy pre-shredded cheese. That’s cheating. Once you have the cheese finely shredded, pile it into your ChefMaster Cheese Compressor. Turn it on.
After 20 minutes or so, the compressor will have formed the shredded cheese back into neat blocks, just the way you bought it. Lay them into your lasagna dish.
Next, layer your UNCOOKED noodles, powdered sauce, and meat over the cheese. Meld the ingredients together using the epoxy. The uncooked lasagna should now be about four inches high. Using a second pan, smash the ingredients into a dense layer about one inch thick. Remember: with this recipe, DENSITY IS THE KEY.
Preheat your oven to 350 degrees. Now, we want to give the flavors a chance to blend before we cook our lasagna. Let the lasagna sit on the counter uncovered for five years.
Now, check your oven to be sure you have reached the ideal temperature of 350, then pop the lasagna in for 45 minutes. Remove the lasagna, and cool it quickly by placing it in your CookWell Centrifuge. Spin it at 8,000 RPM’s for 30 minutes, or until cool. Be careful! Those edges are sharp!
Next, you’ll need to discourage your lasagna. Shout hateful insults at it for 15-20 minutes, at the top of your voice. Then give it a good, long stare. Try to stare at your lasagna in complete silence for at least two hours.
As an optional step, you can decorate the top of your lasagna with a blowtorch, or serve it immediately. The lasagna, which now has a density approximately 150% greater than titanium, can be used as a super-durable welcome mat, or hung around your neck as a bullet-proof vest.
Enjoy!
Scotto joins in on the questionnaire hubbub.
Do you wish on stars? Yup.
Which finger is your fave finger? Thumbs are great. (If they don’t count, the pointer.)
When did you last cry? Last Monday.
If you were making a movie about yourself, who would play you? Richard Moll, or maybe that Grizzly Adams guy.
Do you like your handwriting? It is adequate.
Who are you jealous of? Dilettants
What is your favorite lunch meat? cheese 🙂
Any bad habits? Addicted to LJ. Too giving to people who take advantage. Gossip.
Would you be friends with you? Yes, although I don’t think I’d room with me.
Are you a daredevil? nope. although I’ll rise to many occasions.
Do you follow or lead? Lead, if one is needed. (Doesn’t anyone else have a preferece for lunch, movies, or places to go?)
Have you ever told a secret you swore you wouldn’t tell? No. But I would if there were extenuating circumstances (Life or death, etc)
Have you ever stolen anything? As a child, I was a filcher until about age 8. Nowadays, I do use napster, if you count that. I call it radio.
Do you pray? I meditate.
What do you do to vent anger? Write, complain, consult a rich fantasy life, Punch the living daylights out of an erect mattress, walk.
Are you passive or aggressive? Agressive, except for dealing with business partners.
Who do you look up to? Ben Franklin, my buddy Kevin, Rick Overton.
Who is your second family? Dave & Cathi, Kevin, Karen, and Danny.
What was your favorite toy as a child? Security Blanket, army men.
Do you like sappy love songs? Oh yeah.
Have you ever been on radio or television? TV, was in a promotional ‘donate blood’ spot.
Do you have a journal? self explanitory.
Have you ever been intentionally hurt by another person? Yes. More than once.
Have you ever intentionally hurt another person? Yes, but it was for the best.
Have you ever been in a mosh pit? Yes, but not going back.
Do you feel understood most of the time? Yes. I could be mistaken though. 🙂
Would you rather have a sore throat or an upset stomach? no thank you. (seriously, I’d refer a sore throat)
Have you thought seriously about committing suicide? No.
Would you ever skydive? Yes, but I’d research the company and trainers to a fault.
Do you untie your shoes every time you take them off? Nope!
Have you ever given money to a bum? yes, more often food.
What are you worried about right now? nothing, really. first thing to come to mind? Homeless people, hungry children.
Do you think you are strong? Yes.
What’s your favorite scent? lots and lots. I like baking bread, pine trees, Newton, especially, but I’m really quite variable on this point.