Tag Archives: freeflow

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Today, I make a point of packing at least one box a day. two, or more if possible. I’d like to have everything ready to roll comfortably by a week from Saturday.

First thing to attack – my books.

Also, it’s time to decide if some of those things I haven’t used in the year since I moved here get purged, or retained. I’m a terrible pack-rat. I think that the Atari ST will be trashed… I have an emulator for the PC now… and I really haven’t booted the machine since it arrived.

The reel to reel recorder can go to goodwill, along with many of the clothes I’ve not made use of.

I’m keeping the Godzilla slippers.

I’m keeping my ties, in case of a court date, funeral or a wedding. (Unless the wedding is very lax, I won’t wear my Godzilla slippies there)

Old stereo… I’ll probably toss, but will keep a few of the albums. (real albums… even if I don’t have a turntable… the nostalgia is great.)

Free-flow thought…re:walkies to the mall of the dead

Who has left this golden day,
I don’t know, but I have found it…

Beautiful morning, remember me?
Who sat here once in days of spring…not all too long ago
Flowers were everywhere here… even in the doorway…
These ruins… the Parthenons of Pompano
weeds and cans and broken bricks… and I am a child again,
across the blowing fields
On this spot three years ago in pouring rain I leapt a puddle to help a crying baby… shortly his mother retrieved him and thanked me.
strange soft day… I think now of the time when I’ll be somewhere else, and the land will still be here.

I look up and see trails in the sky , a silver plane so silent… the airships will remain here, too. I’ll miss the blimps.

Leaves blow.

Old telephone pole covered in staples…there must be thousands.
Only on a day like today do I remember to notice such obscure treats.

Walking, wandering like a breath of air… floating like a cloud.
So many old places here.

Heavens have rolled by
many seasons
oceans of pavement
long gray lines of time…
since I last really looked at this spot.

they were supposed to tear down the mall years ago
no one knows why they never did.
look at the windows
like eyes frozen half closed, in the moment before sleep.

look at the drain pipe hanging half off

look at me standing here looking at it and talking to myself.
remember blowing soap bubbles in ’96… waiting for a ride.
cross-legged and smiling

in the parking lot
unspoken words
like cheap toys
fall from my lips

footprints echo from the past,
skies stare out from my shielded eyes
daytime wear on the heels of my shoes

I am here now,
wandering in and out of myself

my mind makes invisible phone calls to parties who don’t need to answer.
it’s enough that I reach to them.

life seems to be in slow motion
and the laughter sounds like angels

shadows move before I can look at them
and reaching out of the dark
behind my back
barely touching…
ghosts of moments gone and done.

memories
barely just alive
like tingled vertebrae
scamper through the rattled junk

I may not return to this place again
even if I do… it won’t seem the same.

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sickness getting worse
called doc and was told to go to the ER for a chest X-ray

2001/10/23 15:04:16 – arrived at emergency room, filled out paperwork, mentioned bloody, opaque phlegm, difficulty breathing, cough etc, and sat here for 45 min.

about 8 people ahead of me, most not looking terribly severe, save for an older lady with a damaged hand. Some sort of cut, 2 fingers immobilized in bloody gauze. Also here are a few drunks (or stoned?) good mix of ages… ER is filling up now. Estimated count at maybe 30ish people. Cute kids playing quietly near a mom who stepped on a bit of glass. I’m alternating between reading the onion and writing character sketches on the palm. (I picked the wrong day to leave lappie at home! Craving AOK scripting or a keyboard to write on.) tagged 15:49:50 then returned to waiting. A doppelganger of gina moog just came in, clenching her jaw… I wonder what’s hurting… I hate the ER, so much pain here…limping, moaning, hurt. I wish my doc had an x-ray in his office. Lots of folks in need of repair. The girl next to me was regaling earlier about burning urine. (I can be approachable at times, after all!) I hope that I get out of here and home before sundown… So tired. It’s now 16:20:10 maybe 5 people here now, many more serious injuries got priority over mine, understandably so. 17:50:30…still sitting here. Severe headache from coughing, making me a little fidgety, hard to make myself comfortable. Met the RN 18:06:21 and am now in a room awaiting some radiation… They took even more info about me, I’m embarrassed to say that I didn’t know some of the answers (Like the last time I had pneumonia.) taken to the rad-room at 18:41:28 was finally photogged at 18:54:16. While waiting, I met a nice little boy who is going to have a heart series done. His name’s Marcus, and is a total sweetie. He’s 7, and has had 2 heart attacks already. Now back in room 1 again, playing the waiting game. Got a prescription for antibiotics and bed rest. Released and waiting for cab at 19:20:17 on my 3rd pharmacy, none take my new insurance. I’ve given up on them, paying cash for meds instead. Now stuck here for an estimated 45 minutes. It’s now 20:04:53 home at 20:47:10

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just got home.

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Going to hit the sack in about 30 min…

I feel like I have too many irons in the fire… stories to write, programs to produce, a Halloween costume to create, skills in assorted areas to polish.

I’ve got mixed feelings, good, that I’m able to produce… but bad that there are only so many hours in the day to create and learn. I suppose that it’s just a matter of prioritizing, and letting things go where they will.

I found out that Karen and Carmen are now so far on the outs, cohabitation is no longer a valid option. šŸ™ that’s too bad, because they’re both very nice people. Well, I can only hope that they manage to find more comfortable living arrangements soon.

The cold seems to be abating, anyway. While I was out sick, Ex-bosses son’s wife turned in her resignation, after telling everyone at the company that the ex-boss would be returning in 2 weeks to take over the workplace again. if that happens, the company will fold as a result of the mass exodus of programmer-folk. Nobody is willing to go back to his regime again, after discovering what working for a real corp is like. As a daughter company to Ramada, we’ve been losing money via bad times for travelling. If we got rid of Ex-boss’s son, that’d free up six large figures for the company to use…. he’s the general manager there now, and all he’s generally managing to do is hide in his office behind locked doors, surfing the web for a 5 or less hour day. He recently pointed fingers at me for surfing and working, which was an attempt to remove blame from himself. Now, I’ve got tracking software installed, monitoring everyone’s “surfitude” I’m poisoning the well a little, only surfing LJ or non-cool sites via Mr laptop. (The reason this post is friend’s only… I know Terri reads my journal without a membership via my homepage.)

I’ve since been assured by the powers above that Wally won’t be returning, and Ramada has stated that Wally’s not only not returning, but there’s a restraining order keeping him from the premises. I will withhold taking that as gospel, but give a good 90-95% chance that Wally won’t be returning.

Enough gabbing about work.

Saw the ‘first contact’ episode of enterprise last night (the only episode I’ve seen, save for the pilot.) It wasn’t bad, but there wasn’t too much to it. guy goes over, touches alien, comes back and finds out he’s preggers, then the crew seeks the aliens back out. That’s really about it. I give it a 5 of 10. blah. Nothing counting for it, but not against it, either. I imagine if the next ep I see is the same, I’ll watch it if I see it, but won’t actively seek it out. (sort of as it stands now.)

I really don’t watch much tube, unless my sweetie is around. Current fun is MAD TV, an episode of COPS, adult swim on the cartoon network, or some discovery channel. I’ll tune in for a meal maybe, but I really don’t have anything that I *must see* to the exclusion of something else.

smallville? Mutant X? nah. maybe in reruns A pity they sacked the lone gunmen.

Ah well. going to lay down and read some Dhalgren for a bit before drifting off. say, when did amazon start putting sample pages in the entries? neat! anyhow, I got the book about a year ago, and pulled it out of a book box after my shelves entry. Looks good! *picks up newtie, and heads for bed*

nigh night.

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My Favorite Line From Wizard of Oz

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“Come out… come out… where-ever you are. To meet the young la-ady who fell from a star” Glenda was such a cool witch. Seemed like she was out of it the whole time, but then again, she did ride around in a bubble.

Dave might be giving me his old Mac this weekend… which would be very cool for doing development even more cross-platform. Now, I’m thinking about what the Network name on the Hive might be. (Current Network elements are Queen (big Brain), Worker (Lappie), and Drone (Palm).) So far, Pupa was offered, and I like that… but I figure I have until it gets strapped into the network (oh boy! AppleTalk! I haven’t dealt with that in about 2 years…we’ll see how hard or easy it is to add it to the hive at all. I’d like to share the dsl net connection and files) . I’m excited… I had a line on a free mac before, but the bottom fell out of that deal. This machine is the last one before the IMAC candy-colored ones came out… it’s beige. šŸ™‚

You know, one day, I’ll have a lovely library in my home, with overstuffed chairs, wireless net connections, tasty scents of sandalwood and such, high bookcases reaching to the ceiling, and plenty of well read, loved books on the shelves. Meanwhile, I’ll have to be happy with boxes in my closet. Maybe this weekend I’ll get some shelves, and make more of my texts simpler to access.

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Monkey brain probe The Monkey brain edibility probe is now on the market, disguised as a ‘healing massage device’. don’t believe it.

The Jiffy-pop Apes are simply using your desire for comfortable scalps to thier own advantage. Don’t succumb! Next thing you know, you’ll be showing your nipples to complete strangers. Settle on boobypops instead.

Just you wait, you’ll see… but then it’ll be far too late for me to help you.

Maybe it’s time to call in the anti-primate revenge squad… sadly, humans are primates too. I wonder if the kittens in capes can possibly make things right?

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I want a buttered muffin, a carafe of OJ, and a back rub.

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instead, a protein bar, water and petting Newt will do.

I’m fiddling with my homepage. I wanted to make it as omni-browser safe as possible. That may not be probable.

Netscape people – I’m tired of doing loads of extra coding because your crap little browser does not conform to the set of published standards. So there. I am not a Microsoft fanboy, but I do believe they have the best browser.

Just to help anyone to understand the pain in the butt that Netscape is: I’ve made this nice little DHTML thing that lets you select a picture from a drop down menu and then changes the picture and the caption underneath. It works like a baboon on acid in IE, but of course, NS chokes and dies when this is in fact all pretty standard stuff.

I’ve seen and tested Netscape 6.1, and the little SOB still won’t show the pics.

What happened? Netscape used to be the cutting-edge one. I hate Bill Gates as much as the next guy, but the product is superior.

I really dislike making something that one group is left out on, but I don’t know… maybe it’s time to say “sorry guys, what you get is what you have, if you had the better *just as free* browser, instead. not safe for five browsers, just good for lynx level text only, and the whee-fun msie with flash and DHTML schtuff.

made lots of fun flash thingies, but nothing final..little popboopdingthings. more learning procedures. amazing, versatile and simple language.

So, anyway… where’s my sweetie? I think she went back to bed and closed the lid tight, like Tupperware. (No wonder she’s so young looking!) šŸ˜‰ My little Moonflower seems to be extra sleepy lately…well, I’ll just think good thoughts for sleeping beauty and bounce from writing to code to reading by her side until she gets up. Hopefully she’ll wake long enough for us to watch mad tv or snl tonight.

I need to give myself a writing project. a fresh genre, maybe. Mystery? Western? Romance? A silly, light comic-booky story?

I dunno…

Landlord left. He’ll be back tomorrow to put insulation and patch drywall.

Carman quit yesterday (with good reason) , and that probably means Karen won’t be far behind. It’s too bad, but probably couldn’t be avoided. A shame though, because they’re both good people, good workers, and people I could see being work-buddies with. They’ll still be pals, but I won’t see as many happy, pleasant faces.

Maybe something about work?

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ponderings

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Half the time I have something to write about I can’t figure out how to go about doing it. I’m not in the “writing” mood right now today, however, I am in the “having something written” mood, so I just can’t please myself. I just sat for about 20-something minutes trying to decide if I was gonna write anything or not, listening to Atom Heart Mother…I know it was twenty something minutes cause the song just ended…and trying to talk to myself in (cue freaky organs…) Crazy Anne Heche Speak like Celestia.. Sometimes I even understand what I’m saying. I’m not gay, nor am I crazy, though… just fun to simulate a fake self-language, in the style of hers.

This afternoon I was sitting in my chair, minding my own business, when out of nowhere I hear this quick pung! (midway between ping! and pong! I’m thinking). I have no idea what caused it, but I know it leapt from the parking lot outside…well, I think so.

Last night, after my sweetheart went to bed, I went out and bought groceries at Publix and purchased there a single unit of my favorite hard-to-find fruit. ( like others more, but it’s rare when I see these.) A pomegranate. I’ve spent the better part of today with my treat, picking out one tiny seeded juice sac at a time, sucking it through my teeth to get all luscious bits, and spitting out the seeds. I love pomegranates. This is my first in quite a while. I can’t seem to find them ever at the green grocer, or Winn Dixie, probably because I’m the only one who likes them. I suppose if we have to invent seedless grapes and seedless oranges… It’s too wet here to grow them locally, but they’re tasty.

Interestingly, the French word for pomegranate is grenade.

I may have a little kitchen experiment tonight, because I’ve stumbled upon a Middle Eastern/Turkish recipes website. I think I’ll make myself a slightly modified aijet beythat. That’s sautĆ©ed hard-boiled eggs (new to me) with butter, cinnamon, white pepper, paprika, and salt. It looks good!

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raindrops tapping on the window

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I’m sitting here writing perl code and looking out of the window. The whole sky is this dull, uniform grey, it’s raining, and I’m thinking “wow. Rain is bizarre. Seriously! It’s stuff falling from the sky. If it were anything else except for water falling, there’d be mass panic. I mean, to get up into the sky, you need a big honking plane or a helicopter or something. It takes effort. It took humanity a few thousand years to get from ‘ug, sky big’ to balloons, and then another few centuries to planes. It takes work to get up there. Anything in the sky is serious stuff.

Apart from a lot of water, which we accept with complete equanimity.”

Now this wet, thick air is moving in over the city… enveloping the entire town in a wet, thick embrace, and mist is condensing on the outside of my window, since it’s maybe 10 degrees cooler inside than out. It’s a day which makes me pine for bed, the comfort of my love’s arms, soft talk and easy sleep.

Side note. When I was 13, my age *was* my shoe size.

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Flipping through a book of maps
I come to rest on one of a land not so far from here, a place I’ve never been.
The location has a simple name, one that might make a good one for a pet.
I can see the home of the one I care most for, near the bay, not so far from a lighthouse.

I touch that point on the page, and feel the pulse of my finger there
beating, my heart-rate pressing in slow beats over her city
the tip warming with blood and love, I raise the pointer to my lips and kiss it softly,
imagining that she’s there, a tiny amoeba inside a ridge of my fingerprint.

my hand brushes along the page,
tracing a footpath along the beach with her
walking with shoes off watching the sea lap the shore.
a place where we would warm a bench, play horseshoes.

she could point out the old barn
the big tree in the field
a friendly horse or two
the place where she sings sometimes with her friends.

the sky is gray there, now
air getting cold, wind kicking up
I give her my jacket and my arm
the feeling of her close to me is better than anything else imaginable.

Everything I see reminds me of her
how she’d react, what she’d say
expressions, sounds, scents and emotions.
She touches every cell of my being, permeating, lightening me.

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chupacabra song

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chupa chup. not to be confused with chupacabra.Chupacabra! not a lollypop!!Her name is Chupa, the Chupacabra,
With ugly spikeys in her hair and a spine exposed to air.
She don’t meringue, don’t do no cha-cha,
But it’s the thing she does the best, That most people do detest.
She does it all night long, just listen to my song.
One day a goat will be walking by,
Next he’s awfully dry.

She’s the Chupa (Chup), the Chupacabra (Chupacabra)
Her mealtime’s a taste of macabre (Yeah?)
Yes, the Chupa (Chup), the Chupacabra (Ooh),
She sucks goat’s blood and she’s not my bud
Yes she’s the Chupa….She strikes at night.

His name was Pico. He was a farmer.
He once had 30 head of goat, now not one darn sheepskin coat,
Because the Chupa, she paid a visit.
And while our Pico slept in bed, Chup enjoyed much blood-a-red,
Pico woke up that day,
Did not know what to say,
There was blood and some 30 goat heads,
He knelt down to pray. She’s the Chupa (Chup), the Chupacabra (Chupacabra),
Her mealtime’s a taste of macabre (Yeah?)
Yes, the Chupa (Chup), the Chupacabra (Ooh),
She sucks goat’s blood and she’s not my bud
Yes she’s the Chupa….She strikes at night.

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Whatever happened to the Burger King?

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When I was a kid I remember seeing the Burger King in commercials. He was a real guy. He danced around performing magic and helping kids get Burger King meals. All that seems to be left of the Kings legacy is the paper replica of his crown that you can get for the little scamps.

and why do both ronald mcdonald and the burger king have red hair?

speaking of which, I’ve been to the very 1st bk lounge… it’s The first location is at 3090 NW 36th Street, should you care to visit.

*hungry

I want onion rings!