Woolgathering: What most people call their “self” is, for the most part, a bundle of different moods, impulses, and roles fighting for control. “I decided” usually means “one impulse temporarily won.”

If this sounds preposterous, spend some time in honest “self-observation”. I’m betting you find a constellation of “selves” rather a self.

The “self” you experience when hearing a nostalgic song, for example, can be very different from the “self” that you experience after stubbing your toe or getting cut off in traffic. Often dramatically different.

In the episode “Troubled Waters,” the good Lieutenant seems to pass some gas, and it can clearly be heard. After Columbo first examines the crime scene, he heads to the doctor’s office to get help for his seasickness. Just as he reaches the top of the steps, just before he reaches the doctor’s door, you can clearly hear two farts. He even sighs after the first one. Now, I thought it might have been the floor creaking or the ship settling, but that particular sound is never heard again in the episode. So, say what you will, but I’m convinced it’s a fart, and the sound guy missed it… or perhaps they left it in. After all, he was experiencing problems with his tummy.